Dear Friend,

Let’s talk about a topic that doesn’t always get the attention it deserves: family conflicts over inheritance. I’ve seen firsthand how, even in the most well-meaning families, emotions can run high and relationships can be torn apart over the division of assets after a loved one passes. It’s heartbreaking, and it’s something that can often be avoided with the right planning.

One story that sticks with me is about a family of three siblings. Their father passed away without a clear, detailed estate plan in place. He had a will, but it wasn’t specific enough about how his assets—particularly the family home—should be divided. What started as a civil conversation quickly spiraled into a bitter feud. The siblings couldn’t agree on whether to sell the house or let the youngest sibling, who had been living there, stay. The tension escalated, and the once-close siblings ended up in court, spending thousands of dollars in legal fees and ruining their relationships in the process. What should have been a time of family unity became a battle that left lasting scars.

This kind of family conflict is more common than you might think. When there’s ambiguity or a lack of clear direction in an estate plan, misunderstandings, jealousy, and disagreements can easily arise. The grief of losing a parent or loved one, combined with the complexity of dividing assets, often brings out emotions people don’t expect. The result? Families torn apart—sometimes forever.

But here’s the good news: it doesn’t have to be this way. With the right estate planning, you can prevent these disputes before they ever start. At Bascom Law, we help families create thorough, legally sound plans that ensure a smooth transition of assets and prevent misunderstandings and rivalries.

Here are some strategies that can help avoid family conflicts over inheritance:

  1. Create a Detailed Estate Plan
    The more detailed, the better. Leaving things vague or open to interpretation is a recipe for conflict.
  2. Use a Trust to Bypass Probate
    Probate can be a lengthy and emotionally charged process, especially if there’s any disagreement over the will. By placing your assets in a trust, you can bypass probate altogether.
  3. Consider Using a Third-Party Trustee
    When one sibling or family member is put in charge of dividing assets, resentment can easily build. By appointing a neutral third-party trustee— such as a CPA or an attorney — you can remove the emotional weight from the decision-making process.
  4. Discuss Your Estate Plan With Your Family Ahead of Time
    Having an open conversation with your family about your estate plan can prevent surprises later on. When heirs know exactly what to expect, they’re less likely to feel slighted or blindsided when the time comes.
  5. Use a Letter of Instruction for Personal Items
    Sometimes the biggest fights are over the smallest things—sentimental items like family heirlooms, jewelry, or even furniture. By writing a separate letter of instruction that details who should receive these personal items, you can prevent future disagreements.
  6. Equal Is Not Always Fair
    Keep in mind that an equal division of assets isn’t always the fairest option. In some cases, one child may have different financial needs or may have provided more care for you in your later years. This is where you need to consider carefully how you want to allocate your estate—and communicate those decisions clearly in your plan.

These simple steps can make all the difference. Everything needs to be written down, legally binding, and easy to understand, so there’s no room for interpretation. When families are left guessing or trying to figure out what their loved one “would have wanted,” that’s when emotions start to boil over.

At Bascom Law, we specialize in creating estate plans that avoid these family conflicts. We’ll help you think through every detail—no matter how small—so that your family isn’t left fighting or confused when you’re no longer here. Call us today at 770-285-5493 to schedule a consultation, and we’ll help you create a rock-solid plan that protects your family’s future and keeps the peace.

Sincerely and Thanks,

Mike

Mike Bascom
Bascom Law, PC
Estate Planning & Elder Law